Post by Jman2k3 on Jul 9, 2018 22:35:29 GMT
Joe Hoffman: And welcome back ladies and gentlemen, if you are just tuning in you are in for a treat because this is the championship edition of the show as the tag team champion will be up for grabs as the former champions, David Black and Cecilworth Farthington, look to knock off the current champions, John Sektor and Scott Stevens.
Benny Newell: New champions guarantee it Hoffman.
Joe Hoffman: Why’s that Benny?
Benny Newell: Because Black Dick never lost them in the first place and they are just taking back what belongs to them.
Joe Hoffman: Not going to argue that because if that unfortunate injury didn’t occur to Cecilworth they may still be the champions.
“WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH….THE TOUGH GET GOING!” is heard throughout the arena as the tune of Billy Ocean begins to serenade the audience. After a few seconds Dirk Dickwood appears from behind the curtain leading the way for his clients. Black and Farthington stare at the empty ring as Dickwood shouts out orders before leading them down the ramp towards the ring.
Benny Newell: A fucking general leading his troops into battle. Almost brings a tear to my eye.
As Dickwood shouts orders, “Dirty Deeds” by AC/DC begins to play and the tag team champions make their way onto the stage. The reaction is mixed for the champions as they slowly make their way towards the ring. Sektor and Stevens begin to circle the ring but they never take their eyes off of their opponents. They slowly make their way up the steps and into the ring and await the championship introduction from Brian McVay.
Bryan McVay: Ladies and gentlemen. Tonight’s match is schedule for one fall with a twenty minute time limit. Introducing the challengers, they came in at a combined weight of 470 lbs…They are the team of Cecilworth Farthington and David Black!!!
Farthington raises his arm high in the air to the cheers of the crowd while David Black simply cracks his knuckles.
Bryan McVay: Introducing the champions, they came in at a combined weight of 490 lbs…They are the team of Scott Stevens and John Sektor!!!
Stevens and Sektor raise the tag titles high in the air before handing them over to the referee in charge, Joel Hortega.
Hortega raises the titles in the air for a few seconds before giving them to McVay and signals for the bell.
Ding. Ding.
Joe Hoffman: And here we go.
Dickwood begins to yell at Farthington for him to start the match and Black grudgingly steps back onto the apron.
Joe Hoffman: Am I smelling dissention in the ranks here Benny?
Benny Newell: No that’s probably the nut that’s still caked to my piece from the whore I fucked earlier. Didn’t have time to shower.
Farthington and Sektor lock up and the two jock for position. As one powers forward the other powers back not giving an inch. After a few stalemates, the two challengers release the hold.
Joe Hoffman: Both individuals are feeling the other one out looking to capitalize on a mistake early.
Farthington goes for a quick lock up but Sektor ducks underneath and hooks a leg.
Joe Hoffman: Cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Farthington kicks out and as he looks up from the canvas at Sektor, the former world champion shows him he was a inch from defeat.
Benny Newell: I think Sektor is trying to tell Farthington either that how big his dick is or he likes them that small. Drink.
Farthington tags out to Black and locks up immediately with the Hall of Famer.
Sektor rakes the eyes of Black and ducks the blind punch from him and grabs him from behind.
Joe Hoffman: Sektor looking for a German suplex, but Black had it scouted.
Black continues to block the suplex attempt of Sektor, and he stuns Sektor with an elbow to the face. This gives Black the time needed to snap mare the wrestler of the year to the canvas and kick him in the back of his head.
While Sektor is laying on the mat holding his head, Black makes the quick tag to Farthington. Black and Farthington begin to stomp away at the fallen champion before dropping double elbows to the black heart of Sektor.
Farthington with a cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Sektor with the shoulder up.
Farthington with the quick tag back to Black who immediately mounts the Gold Standard and starts laying in old fashion rights hands to the face of John Sektor.
Joe Hoffman: Black and Farthington using their experience as a team to cut off the ring and wear down Sektor.
Benny Newell: New tag champions being crowned tonight.
Once Black is done feeding Sektor a knuckle sandwich, he drags Sektor back up to his feet and delivers a jab.
Joe Hoffman: Black working over Sektor with those combinations.
Sektor blocks Black’s punch and staggers him with a spinning elbow.
Joe Hoffman: Hall of Fame Elbow! Sektor needs to make the tag to Stevens.
Sektor collapses to the mat and crawls his way over to the awaiting Texan.
Joe Hoffman: Come on Sektor you’re almost there….what’s Dickwood doing?
Sektor with his last bit of strength jumps and slaps the hand of his tag team partner who comes in a knocks down Cecilworth Farthington with a stiff lariat. Stevens gets primed and set as David Black starts to regain his bearings.
Stevens doubles over Black a boot to the midsection.
Joe Hoffman: Toxic Sting coming up.
As Stevens goes for his finisher, Hortega gets in the way and signals for him to go back to his corner.
Joe Hoffman: From Hortega’s hand gesturing it seems like he didn’t see Stevens’ tag.
Benny Newell: Fucking brilliant! This is why Dirk Dickwood is the best manager in the history of HOW. The man’s a genius!
Stevens grudgingly goes back onto the apron while Black begins to attack the fallen Sektor. He mocks Stevens who takes a swing but misses.
Joe Hoffman: Stevens is red hot right now and I don’t blame him.
Black pulls Sektor up to his feet and mocks Sektor who can barely stand.
Benny Newell: Don’t just stand there, end this shit!
Black slaps Sektor across the face before jumping up for the Blackout.
Joe Hoffman: COUNTER!
Benny Newell: GOD DAMMIT!!!!
Sektor uses David Black’s momentum to execute a picture perfect sit-out power bomb.
Joe Hoffman: MAKE THE TAG SEKTOR!
Benny Newell: Biased much?
Sektor leaps towards his tag partner and Stevens storms into the ring like a bat out of hell knocking Farthington off the apron with an elbow.
Benny Newell: That’s not very nice you redneck faggot!
Stevens gives Dickwood the official state bird of Texas and mouths the words, “It’s over.”
Stevens turns his attention to Black as he begins to make it back to his feet as Dickwood hops onto the apron to talk to the ref.
Part one.
Boot to gut.
Part two.
Toxic Sting!
Joe Hoffman: Stevens went for the Toxic Sting but Black shoved him off.
Benny Newell: Sweating worse than Kirsta Lewis in a church out here Hoffman.
Stevens turns around to an unfortunate circumstance.
Benny Newell: BLACKOUT! FUCK YOU STEVENS! HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE LONESOME LOSER? HIS NAME IS SCOTT STEVENS!
As Black hooks the Texan’s leg, he notices that Hortega is distracted with Dickwood.
Benny Newell: Get the hell off the apron Dickwood. You’re team has the victory!
Black gets up from the pin to get Hortega’s attention and once he does sprints back into the cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Tres.
Could be…..
Possibly…..
NOPE!
Joe Hoffman: STEVENS KICKS OUT! STEVENS KICKS OUT!
Benny Newell: Fucking bullshit!
David Black yells out in anger and walks over to Dirk Dickwood who is still standing on the apron and grabs him by the collar of his cheap looking suit.
Benny Newell: Don’t do it Black, if it wasn’t for him you wouldn’t have gotten this shot.
Joe Hoffman: If it wasn’t for Dickwood they might have won the match Benny.
Benny Newell: Fuck off!
The former world champion knocks Dirk Dickwood out with a right and walks over to his corner and slaps the still groggy Cecilworth Farthington across the chest before grabbing him and throwing him into the ring.
Black exits the ring and begins to head towards the back and Farthington tries to gather what has just transpired.
As Farthington watches his partner head up the ramp and pleads with him come back, Stevens is almost back up to his feet.
Benny Newell: LOOK OUT!
As Farthington turns around he gets drilled with a super kick from Stevens that staggers him back into their corner. Stevens makes the tag to a newly refreshed John Sektor.
Sektor and Stevens begin to work over Farthington in the corner before Sektor whips the Brit into the ropes and tosses him up high into the air into the waiting Scorpion.
Joe Hoffman: TOXIC STING!
Sektor makes the cover while Stevens is on alert for David Black to break up the pin.
Uno.
Dos.
Tres.!
Benny Newell: FUUUUUUUUUUCK!
The bell sounds and Hortega holds up the tag champions arms in victory.
Bryan McVay: And your winners by pinfall…Scott Stevens and John Sektor!!!
As the two continue to celebrate, David Black simply watches from the stage and shakes his head before heading to the back.
Benny Newell: New champions guarantee it Hoffman.
Joe Hoffman: Why’s that Benny?
Benny Newell: Because Black Dick never lost them in the first place and they are just taking back what belongs to them.
Joe Hoffman: Not going to argue that because if that unfortunate injury didn’t occur to Cecilworth they may still be the champions.
“WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH….THE TOUGH GET GOING!” is heard throughout the arena as the tune of Billy Ocean begins to serenade the audience. After a few seconds Dirk Dickwood appears from behind the curtain leading the way for his clients. Black and Farthington stare at the empty ring as Dickwood shouts out orders before leading them down the ramp towards the ring.
Benny Newell: A fucking general leading his troops into battle. Almost brings a tear to my eye.
As Dickwood shouts orders, “Dirty Deeds” by AC/DC begins to play and the tag team champions make their way onto the stage. The reaction is mixed for the champions as they slowly make their way towards the ring. Sektor and Stevens begin to circle the ring but they never take their eyes off of their opponents. They slowly make their way up the steps and into the ring and await the championship introduction from Brian McVay.
Bryan McVay: Ladies and gentlemen. Tonight’s match is schedule for one fall with a twenty minute time limit. Introducing the challengers, they came in at a combined weight of 470 lbs…They are the team of Cecilworth Farthington and David Black!!!
Farthington raises his arm high in the air to the cheers of the crowd while David Black simply cracks his knuckles.
Bryan McVay: Introducing the champions, they came in at a combined weight of 490 lbs…They are the team of Scott Stevens and John Sektor!!!
Stevens and Sektor raise the tag titles high in the air before handing them over to the referee in charge, Joel Hortega.
Hortega raises the titles in the air for a few seconds before giving them to McVay and signals for the bell.
Ding. Ding.
Joe Hoffman: And here we go.
Dickwood begins to yell at Farthington for him to start the match and Black grudgingly steps back onto the apron.
Joe Hoffman: Am I smelling dissention in the ranks here Benny?
Benny Newell: No that’s probably the nut that’s still caked to my piece from the whore I fucked earlier. Didn’t have time to shower.
Farthington and Sektor lock up and the two jock for position. As one powers forward the other powers back not giving an inch. After a few stalemates, the two challengers release the hold.
Joe Hoffman: Both individuals are feeling the other one out looking to capitalize on a mistake early.
Farthington goes for a quick lock up but Sektor ducks underneath and hooks a leg.
Joe Hoffman: Cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Farthington kicks out and as he looks up from the canvas at Sektor, the former world champion shows him he was a inch from defeat.
Benny Newell: I think Sektor is trying to tell Farthington either that how big his dick is or he likes them that small. Drink.
Farthington tags out to Black and locks up immediately with the Hall of Famer.
Sektor rakes the eyes of Black and ducks the blind punch from him and grabs him from behind.
Joe Hoffman: Sektor looking for a German suplex, but Black had it scouted.
Black continues to block the suplex attempt of Sektor, and he stuns Sektor with an elbow to the face. This gives Black the time needed to snap mare the wrestler of the year to the canvas and kick him in the back of his head.
While Sektor is laying on the mat holding his head, Black makes the quick tag to Farthington. Black and Farthington begin to stomp away at the fallen champion before dropping double elbows to the black heart of Sektor.
Farthington with a cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Sektor with the shoulder up.
Farthington with the quick tag back to Black who immediately mounts the Gold Standard and starts laying in old fashion rights hands to the face of John Sektor.
Joe Hoffman: Black and Farthington using their experience as a team to cut off the ring and wear down Sektor.
Benny Newell: New tag champions being crowned tonight.
Once Black is done feeding Sektor a knuckle sandwich, he drags Sektor back up to his feet and delivers a jab.
Joe Hoffman: Black working over Sektor with those combinations.
Sektor blocks Black’s punch and staggers him with a spinning elbow.
Joe Hoffman: Hall of Fame Elbow! Sektor needs to make the tag to Stevens.
Sektor collapses to the mat and crawls his way over to the awaiting Texan.
Joe Hoffman: Come on Sektor you’re almost there….what’s Dickwood doing?
Sektor with his last bit of strength jumps and slaps the hand of his tag team partner who comes in a knocks down Cecilworth Farthington with a stiff lariat. Stevens gets primed and set as David Black starts to regain his bearings.
Stevens doubles over Black a boot to the midsection.
Joe Hoffman: Toxic Sting coming up.
As Stevens goes for his finisher, Hortega gets in the way and signals for him to go back to his corner.
Joe Hoffman: From Hortega’s hand gesturing it seems like he didn’t see Stevens’ tag.
Benny Newell: Fucking brilliant! This is why Dirk Dickwood is the best manager in the history of HOW. The man’s a genius!
Stevens grudgingly goes back onto the apron while Black begins to attack the fallen Sektor. He mocks Stevens who takes a swing but misses.
Joe Hoffman: Stevens is red hot right now and I don’t blame him.
Black pulls Sektor up to his feet and mocks Sektor who can barely stand.
Benny Newell: Don’t just stand there, end this shit!
Black slaps Sektor across the face before jumping up for the Blackout.
Joe Hoffman: COUNTER!
Benny Newell: GOD DAMMIT!!!!
Sektor uses David Black’s momentum to execute a picture perfect sit-out power bomb.
Joe Hoffman: MAKE THE TAG SEKTOR!
Benny Newell: Biased much?
Sektor leaps towards his tag partner and Stevens storms into the ring like a bat out of hell knocking Farthington off the apron with an elbow.
Benny Newell: That’s not very nice you redneck faggot!
Stevens gives Dickwood the official state bird of Texas and mouths the words, “It’s over.”
Stevens turns his attention to Black as he begins to make it back to his feet as Dickwood hops onto the apron to talk to the ref.
Part one.
Boot to gut.
Part two.
Toxic Sting!
Joe Hoffman: Stevens went for the Toxic Sting but Black shoved him off.
Benny Newell: Sweating worse than Kirsta Lewis in a church out here Hoffman.
Stevens turns around to an unfortunate circumstance.
Benny Newell: BLACKOUT! FUCK YOU STEVENS! HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE LONESOME LOSER? HIS NAME IS SCOTT STEVENS!
As Black hooks the Texan’s leg, he notices that Hortega is distracted with Dickwood.
Benny Newell: Get the hell off the apron Dickwood. You’re team has the victory!
Black gets up from the pin to get Hortega’s attention and once he does sprints back into the cover.
Uno.
Dos.
Tres.
Could be…..
Possibly…..
NOPE!
Joe Hoffman: STEVENS KICKS OUT! STEVENS KICKS OUT!
Benny Newell: Fucking bullshit!
David Black yells out in anger and walks over to Dirk Dickwood who is still standing on the apron and grabs him by the collar of his cheap looking suit.
Benny Newell: Don’t do it Black, if it wasn’t for him you wouldn’t have gotten this shot.
Joe Hoffman: If it wasn’t for Dickwood they might have won the match Benny.
Benny Newell: Fuck off!
The former world champion knocks Dirk Dickwood out with a right and walks over to his corner and slaps the still groggy Cecilworth Farthington across the chest before grabbing him and throwing him into the ring.
Black exits the ring and begins to head towards the back and Farthington tries to gather what has just transpired.
As Farthington watches his partner head up the ramp and pleads with him come back, Stevens is almost back up to his feet.
Benny Newell: LOOK OUT!
As Farthington turns around he gets drilled with a super kick from Stevens that staggers him back into their corner. Stevens makes the tag to a newly refreshed John Sektor.
Sektor and Stevens begin to work over Farthington in the corner before Sektor whips the Brit into the ropes and tosses him up high into the air into the waiting Scorpion.
Joe Hoffman: TOXIC STING!
Sektor makes the cover while Stevens is on alert for David Black to break up the pin.
Uno.
Dos.
Tres.!
Benny Newell: FUUUUUUUUUUCK!
The bell sounds and Hortega holds up the tag champions arms in victory.
Bryan McVay: And your winners by pinfall…Scott Stevens and John Sektor!!!
As the two continue to celebrate, David Black simply watches from the stage and shakes his head before heading to the back.