Post by Jman2k3 on Jul 9, 2018 21:33:06 GMT
As Joe finishes the lights in the arena die down as red lasers and spot lights on the stage appear. The HOTv flashes to life with a Texan flag and the words “Texas Born. Texas Bred. Texas Forever.” burning themselves into the flag image before “Till I Collapse” by Eminem fills the arena. There is a decent pop for Scott Stevens as the big Texan makes his way out onto the stage. He poses for a moment before making his way down to the ring, fist bumping some of the fans on his way.
Bryan McVay: Introducing first, hailing from the great state of Texas, standing at 6 foot 6 inches and weighing in at 256 pounds.. SCOTT STEVENS!
Stevens climbs up into the ring, moving to a turn buckle to pose before he hopes back down, “Till I Collapse” slowly fading away. “Killing in the Name Of” by Rage Against the Machine hits the PA as Noah Hanson makes his way out onto the stage looking smug, the fans booing loudly upon his arrival. Hanson glares at the audience before making his way down to the ring, avoiding the hands and generally dismissing the crowd that was on hand.
Bryan McVay: His opponent, hailing from Kansas City, Kansas.. standing at 6 foot, 3 ¾ inches and weighing 237 pounds… NOAH HANSON!
Hanson quickly slips into the ring and poses as referee Joel Hortega quickly slips into the ring while Bryan McVay leaves.
Joe Hoffman: Joel Hortega signally for the bell and this match is under way..
Ding ding ding!
Stevens charges toward Hanson who skillfully side steps…
NOAH HANSON WITH A VICTORY ROLL!! Hanson has his hands on the ropes but Hortega is distracted with the pinfall!
UNO!
DOS!!
TRES!!!
WINNER: Noah Hanson in 3 seconds!
Hanson quickly slips out of the ring with a smirk on his face while Stevens scrambles to his feet with a look of complete surprise. The big Texan grabs Joel Hortega by the shirt screaming at him however he is only met with Spanish pleas to be released. The sound of a loud snorting can be heard..
Benny Newell: OH DAMN! THE BEST PART OF WAKING UP IS COCAINE IN YOUR CUP!!
The camera moves to Benny and Joe as Benny shots up, his eyes wide with a fine white power under his nose.
Joe Hoffman: Well, folks, Noah Hanson steals one right out from under Stevens with a lightning fast victory here folks! Blink and you might have missed it..
Benny Newell: THE FUCK!?! I MISSED IT!?! HOW LONG WAS I OUT!?!?!
The opening riffs to “Down Again” by Charlie Robison play over the sound system.
Joe Hoffman: Hey wait a minute. That’s Ray McAvay’s theme music.
On cue, Ray McAvay, dressed in street clothes, and his wife Dawn McGill make their way to the ring.
Joe Hoffman: McAvay has been away tending to personal business and the PCW Reunion show so I’m not quite sure why he’s here tonight.
Benny Newell: Forget McAvay Hoffman. Where are the strippers? Where are the fucking strippers?
Joe Hoffman: You’ll see them later tonight Benny.
Benny Newell: Even though I will say, you can definitely tell that Dawn McGill is pregnant.
Joe Hoffman: How’s that? She’s not showing yet.
Benny Newell: Oh yeah? Have you looked at her tits Hoffman? They’re fucking huge-ger!
Joe Hoffman: No. I haven’t made it a point to look at Dawn’s chest. Yes. Breast enhancement can be one of the byproducts of being pregnant.
Benny Newell: Jesus Hoffman. She’s got nice tits. Why can’t you just say that?
McAvay climbs into the ring and goes right up to Stevens.
Joe Hoffman: Back to the action, I wonder what’s going to happen here?
Ray stares down at the Scorpion and shakes his head sadly. Finally Ray offers a hand to Stevens to help him up.
Joe Hoffman: McAvay is helping him up?
McAvay pulls Stevens back up and circles the ring with him.
Joe Hoffman: I don’t understand what he’s doing.
Benny Newell: Just wait Hoffman. I know exactly what he’s doing.
As if on cue, Ray spins Stevens around and kicks him in the stomach doubling him over. McAvay grabs Stevens behind his head and sits out bringing Stevens down headfirst to the mat.
Benny Newell: TOXIC STING!
Stevens bounces up off the mat and lands on his back. McAvay immediately hooks the leg to make the cover. McGill points referee Joel Hortega back to the ring. Hortega refuses until Dawn reminds him that Dark and Stormy are McAvay’s valets so if he wanted any more free ‘looks’ and lapdances he’d better get back into the ring. Then she literally shoves Hortega back in. Hortega reluctantly pounds his hand three times on the mat. Hortega reluctantly pounds his hand three times on the mat. McGill then goes over to Ring Announcer Bryan McVay and whispers something in his ear. McVay also climbs back into the ring and raises the microphone to his mouth.
Bryan McVay: And your winner by pinfall…Ray McAvay!
Ray takes the microphone from McVay.
Ray McAvay: That was for Ryan McKenna.
Benny Newell: Hoffman, remember? Stevens did the same thing to McAvay a few weeks back after Ray defeated McKenna. Stevens came into the ring and pretended to congratulate McAvay and took him out with McKenna’s finisher.
Joe Hoffman: And of course, two weeks ago Stevens may have ended McKenna’s career.
McAvay stands over Stevens.
Ray McAvay: You know, Paul Heyman once said that ‘wrestling is an art form. I don’t worry about those who don’t get it; I worry about satisfying those who do.’ The key word there being ‘wrestling’, not sports entertainment. Do you remember that interview with Blair in June? I sure as hell do. I questioned your motives for moonlight in another fed and you called it ‘slander.’ You got so upset with me that you pulled that little stunt after the McKenna match and then tried to bring my family into this. But guess what? I was right. You sold out. You sold your soul Stevens to the siren song of big money and in the end, you sacrificed everything you’ve worked for on the altar of sports entertainment. And now look where it got you. You’ve lost your way. You let down every person in that locker room who stayed here and kept plugging away week after week. You let down our fans.
Ray shakes his head.
Ray McAvay: I’m not mad Scott. I actually feel sorry for you. I’m sure what I just did here is nothing compared to what’s coming your way later on.
Ray drops the microphone and rolls out of the ring. He meets up with McGill and heads to the back.
Joe Hoffman: So technically that’s a win for Noah Hanson and then a win for Ray McAvay. What else is going to happen tonight?
Benny Newell: Hoffman. Stevens is in for a long-
The crowd roars as someone sprints down the aisle in the upper tier of seating in the Best Arena.
Joe Hoffman: All right. Now what’s going on?
Benny Newell: It looks like someone’s running down to the ring.
Then a collective “AWWWWWW…” rings around the arena when everyone realizes who it is. Dressed in his official black H.O.W. overalls with the H.O.W. decal on the lapel and his name tag right below it, the man hopped over the wall and continues toward the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Why is Bert the Janitor coming out here?
Benny Newell: Maybe he’s out to clean the ring of Scott Stevens’s Lonesome Loser residue?
Bert slides stomach first into the ring. He goes over to Stevens and sticks his foot on his stomach.
Joe Hoffman: What is he doing?
Benny Newell: He’s going to fucking win Hoffman. That’s what!
Bert gestures and shouts at Hortega to make the count. Very, very reluctantly, Hortega mumbles something in Spanish, drops to the mat again, and makes the three count on Stevens. Bert then starts jumping in the air as if he’s won a title…or scored again in a closet with Blair Moise.
Benny Newell: HE DID IT! HE DID IT! OH MY GOD, BERT DID IT! DRINK EVERYONE! DRINK!
Bert trips on his own foot while jumping up and down and lurches forward. His momentum takes him in between the top and middle rope and Bert goes flying out of the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Yeah, this is definitely going to be one of those nights.
Bryan McVay: Introducing first, hailing from the great state of Texas, standing at 6 foot 6 inches and weighing in at 256 pounds.. SCOTT STEVENS!
Stevens climbs up into the ring, moving to a turn buckle to pose before he hopes back down, “Till I Collapse” slowly fading away. “Killing in the Name Of” by Rage Against the Machine hits the PA as Noah Hanson makes his way out onto the stage looking smug, the fans booing loudly upon his arrival. Hanson glares at the audience before making his way down to the ring, avoiding the hands and generally dismissing the crowd that was on hand.
Bryan McVay: His opponent, hailing from Kansas City, Kansas.. standing at 6 foot, 3 ¾ inches and weighing 237 pounds… NOAH HANSON!
Hanson quickly slips into the ring and poses as referee Joel Hortega quickly slips into the ring while Bryan McVay leaves.
Joe Hoffman: Joel Hortega signally for the bell and this match is under way..
Ding ding ding!
Stevens charges toward Hanson who skillfully side steps…
NOAH HANSON WITH A VICTORY ROLL!! Hanson has his hands on the ropes but Hortega is distracted with the pinfall!
UNO!
DOS!!
TRES!!!
WINNER: Noah Hanson in 3 seconds!
Hanson quickly slips out of the ring with a smirk on his face while Stevens scrambles to his feet with a look of complete surprise. The big Texan grabs Joel Hortega by the shirt screaming at him however he is only met with Spanish pleas to be released. The sound of a loud snorting can be heard..
Benny Newell: OH DAMN! THE BEST PART OF WAKING UP IS COCAINE IN YOUR CUP!!
The camera moves to Benny and Joe as Benny shots up, his eyes wide with a fine white power under his nose.
Joe Hoffman: Well, folks, Noah Hanson steals one right out from under Stevens with a lightning fast victory here folks! Blink and you might have missed it..
Benny Newell: THE FUCK!?! I MISSED IT!?! HOW LONG WAS I OUT!?!?!
The opening riffs to “Down Again” by Charlie Robison play over the sound system.
Joe Hoffman: Hey wait a minute. That’s Ray McAvay’s theme music.
On cue, Ray McAvay, dressed in street clothes, and his wife Dawn McGill make their way to the ring.
Joe Hoffman: McAvay has been away tending to personal business and the PCW Reunion show so I’m not quite sure why he’s here tonight.
Benny Newell: Forget McAvay Hoffman. Where are the strippers? Where are the fucking strippers?
Joe Hoffman: You’ll see them later tonight Benny.
Benny Newell: Even though I will say, you can definitely tell that Dawn McGill is pregnant.
Joe Hoffman: How’s that? She’s not showing yet.
Benny Newell: Oh yeah? Have you looked at her tits Hoffman? They’re fucking huge-ger!
Joe Hoffman: No. I haven’t made it a point to look at Dawn’s chest. Yes. Breast enhancement can be one of the byproducts of being pregnant.
Benny Newell: Jesus Hoffman. She’s got nice tits. Why can’t you just say that?
McAvay climbs into the ring and goes right up to Stevens.
Joe Hoffman: Back to the action, I wonder what’s going to happen here?
Ray stares down at the Scorpion and shakes his head sadly. Finally Ray offers a hand to Stevens to help him up.
Joe Hoffman: McAvay is helping him up?
McAvay pulls Stevens back up and circles the ring with him.
Joe Hoffman: I don’t understand what he’s doing.
Benny Newell: Just wait Hoffman. I know exactly what he’s doing.
As if on cue, Ray spins Stevens around and kicks him in the stomach doubling him over. McAvay grabs Stevens behind his head and sits out bringing Stevens down headfirst to the mat.
Benny Newell: TOXIC STING!
Stevens bounces up off the mat and lands on his back. McAvay immediately hooks the leg to make the cover. McGill points referee Joel Hortega back to the ring. Hortega refuses until Dawn reminds him that Dark and Stormy are McAvay’s valets so if he wanted any more free ‘looks’ and lapdances he’d better get back into the ring. Then she literally shoves Hortega back in. Hortega reluctantly pounds his hand three times on the mat. Hortega reluctantly pounds his hand three times on the mat. McGill then goes over to Ring Announcer Bryan McVay and whispers something in his ear. McVay also climbs back into the ring and raises the microphone to his mouth.
Bryan McVay: And your winner by pinfall…Ray McAvay!
Ray takes the microphone from McVay.
Ray McAvay: That was for Ryan McKenna.
Benny Newell: Hoffman, remember? Stevens did the same thing to McAvay a few weeks back after Ray defeated McKenna. Stevens came into the ring and pretended to congratulate McAvay and took him out with McKenna’s finisher.
Joe Hoffman: And of course, two weeks ago Stevens may have ended McKenna’s career.
McAvay stands over Stevens.
Ray McAvay: You know, Paul Heyman once said that ‘wrestling is an art form. I don’t worry about those who don’t get it; I worry about satisfying those who do.’ The key word there being ‘wrestling’, not sports entertainment. Do you remember that interview with Blair in June? I sure as hell do. I questioned your motives for moonlight in another fed and you called it ‘slander.’ You got so upset with me that you pulled that little stunt after the McKenna match and then tried to bring my family into this. But guess what? I was right. You sold out. You sold your soul Stevens to the siren song of big money and in the end, you sacrificed everything you’ve worked for on the altar of sports entertainment. And now look where it got you. You’ve lost your way. You let down every person in that locker room who stayed here and kept plugging away week after week. You let down our fans.
Ray shakes his head.
Ray McAvay: I’m not mad Scott. I actually feel sorry for you. I’m sure what I just did here is nothing compared to what’s coming your way later on.
Ray drops the microphone and rolls out of the ring. He meets up with McGill and heads to the back.
Joe Hoffman: So technically that’s a win for Noah Hanson and then a win for Ray McAvay. What else is going to happen tonight?
Benny Newell: Hoffman. Stevens is in for a long-
The crowd roars as someone sprints down the aisle in the upper tier of seating in the Best Arena.
Joe Hoffman: All right. Now what’s going on?
Benny Newell: It looks like someone’s running down to the ring.
Then a collective “AWWWWWW…” rings around the arena when everyone realizes who it is. Dressed in his official black H.O.W. overalls with the H.O.W. decal on the lapel and his name tag right below it, the man hopped over the wall and continues toward the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Why is Bert the Janitor coming out here?
Benny Newell: Maybe he’s out to clean the ring of Scott Stevens’s Lonesome Loser residue?
Bert slides stomach first into the ring. He goes over to Stevens and sticks his foot on his stomach.
Joe Hoffman: What is he doing?
Benny Newell: He’s going to fucking win Hoffman. That’s what!
Bert gestures and shouts at Hortega to make the count. Very, very reluctantly, Hortega mumbles something in Spanish, drops to the mat again, and makes the three count on Stevens. Bert then starts jumping in the air as if he’s won a title…or scored again in a closet with Blair Moise.
Benny Newell: HE DID IT! HE DID IT! OH MY GOD, BERT DID IT! DRINK EVERYONE! DRINK!
Bert trips on his own foot while jumping up and down and lurches forward. His momentum takes him in between the top and middle rope and Bert goes flying out of the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Yeah, this is definitely going to be one of those nights.