Post by Jman2k3 on Aug 29, 2017 0:32:25 GMT
Saturday Night CHAOS
October 2, 1999
15 Man Royal Rumble for #1 Contendership
Mike: Archer is number one in the rumble, and it
doesn't look like Apollo will be joining us for
commentary. Too bad!
Vince: Pretty sarcastic, aren't we? Speaking of not
joining us, that makes me wonder: is Cy Kopath going
to be in the rumble or not?
Mike: That's an interesting point. I don't see how Cy
is going to be able to compete from his County
Hospital bed with third degree burns over 90% of his
body. I guess we're down to 14 men-
Vince: Unless someone else steps in...
[[The DX theme plays and the crowd cheers as X-Pac
walks down to the ring as the second man. He gets in
the ring and ducks a right hand from Archer, hitting a
spinning heel kick on the "Thrilla Killa". X-Pac seems
pumped and sends Archer against the ropes and X-Pac
connects with a flying clothesline. Archer is reeling,
and staggers back into the corner. X-Pac hits Archer
with a combination of kicks, and then gets a running
start and does the Bronco Buster on Archer. X-Pac
gives Archer a crotch chop, but Archer quickly gives
X-Pac a low blow]]
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1-
[["Buttermilk Biscuits" comes on and Bizarro makes his
way to the ring. Bizarro and X-Pac start double
teaming Archer, sending him against the ropes and
flattening him with a double clothesline. Bizarro and
X-Pac lift Archer up and execute a double suplex. All
of a sudden Bizarro kicks X-Pac in the stomach. He
executes a double underhook suplex on X-Pac. Bizarro
then whips X-Pac into the corner, puts X-Pac up top,
and sets up for the Zorro Buster. But Alex Archer
shoves Bizarro off the top rope all the way to the
outside]]
Mike: Bizarro's gone!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[[A car crash sounds over the PA and the crowd goes
wild as Mankind enters the ring. Mankind kicks Archer
in the gut and nails a double arm DDT. Mankind sets
Archer on the ropes and tries to push him over, but
Archer holds on. X-Pac comes over to help, but they
can't get Archer over. The crowd counts down again and
"Bullet With Butterfly Wings" plays as "Deadly" Darren
Dark makes his entrance. DDD tosses the TV title aside
and rolls in the ring, decking Mankind and then X-Pac.
DDD tries to get Archer over himself, but can't, so he
grabs the head of Archer and buries it in the ring mat
with the Deadly Downer. Dark gets up and turns around,
but Mankind is there to shove Mr. Socko in his gullet!
Mankind wears DDD down, forcing him towards the ropes.
X-Pac gets a running start, DDD ducks and X-Pac
connects with a spinning heel kick on Mankind that
sends the Deranged One over the top rope to the
floor]]
Vince: Finally that 190 pound bag of crap X-Pac did
something right! Mankind's fat ass is eliminated!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["Crimson Grin" plays and the crowd goes ballistic as
the former World champ Scorpion slowly walks to the
ring. Meanwhile, DDD and X-Pac slap a high five, but
Alex Archer hooks both from behind, executing a double
Russian leg sweep. Scorpion sees an opening and dives
inside. Alex Archer swings at Scorpion, Scorp ducks,
kicks Archer in the gut and delivers Z'Ha'Dum! Archer
convulses in pain on the mat. The crowd counts down
again and "When Worlds Collide" starts up, with the
fans going crazy as Daddy Mack makes his way to the
ring. DM climbs in and immediately goes after
Scorpion. Mack pummels Scorpion, but Scorpion kneels
down and picks DM up by the waist, pivots, and DDD is
there for the 3D! Scorpion and Darren Dark shake
hands, but DDD jerks Scorpion towards him, lifts him
up, and hits the Lights Out! Archer gets up and tries
to charge DDD, but Dark catches him in a T-bone
suplex, and DDD throws Alex Archer over the top rope
to the floor]]
Mike: Alex Archer has been eliminated from the rumble!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[[Eerie music plays and Lucifer walks to the ring. He
climbs inside and X-Pac goes for a hurricanranna on
Lucifer, but Lucifer catches X-Pac, lifts him up over
the top rope and powerbombs X-Pac all the way to the
concrete floor!!! Darren Dark kicks Lucifer, and
starts to choke him, but Lucifer lifts DDD up and hits
the Sacraficer. Lucifer is gloating, and turns his
back on the rest of his opponents, and Scorpion
clotheslines Lucifer up and over the top rope. The
people countdown and the "Batman/Bugeye" theme plays,
and Bugeye walks to the ring with Andre Wendell.
Bugeye grabs the Funk Force Stick from Andre and dives
in the ring. Bugeye charges Scorpion waiving the Funk
Force Stick, but Scorpion ducks, grabs Bugeye, and
easily tosses Bugeye over the top rope to the
outside!]]
Vince: That retard Bugeye is pissed off, and he isn't
leaving ringside!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["I Will Be the Very Best" comes on and Meowth
motions for Jesse to stay backstage as he walks down
the ramp. DDD and Daddy Mack are fighting in one
corner, and Meowth gets in the ring and goes after
Scorpion. Meowth executes a neckbreaker on Scorpion
and tries to get Scorpion over the top rope. Just then
Bugeye climbs back in the ring behind Scorpion and
Meowth. Andre Wendell gets up on the apron and decks
Meowth in the dome with the Funk Force Stick, and then
Bugeye runs up behind both men and shoves both
Scorpion and Meowth over the top rope! Meowth
immediately jumps back in the ring, chases Bugeye
across it, out the other side, all the way to the
back. Andre Wendell is left alone. Scorpion walks up
to Wendell, glares at him, and then delivers
Z'Ha'Dum!]]
Vince: Wendell may be out cold, but Scorpion is out of
the rumble!
[[Daddy Mack and DDD are left in the ring trading
punches, when Greek music filters over the sound
system and Olympus walks out. Everyone is booing and
Olympus begins kicking Daddy Mack. Just then, after
only about a minute, the "Psycho" music comes on and
Sid walks to the ring to a huge pop from the crowd.
Sid gets in the ring, and Olympus gets a head of steam
off the ropes, but runs right into a big boot from
Sid. DDD and Daddy Mack just watch as Sid thrashes
Olympus. Sid picks Olympus up and powerbombs him. Then
Sid pulls Olympus back up, and slaps a huge hand
around the Greek God's throat. Sid lifts Olympus up
and chokeslams him all the way to the outside!!! Sid
is demanding "Who's the man?!" when Olympus reaches up
the ring and grabs a steel chair. Olympus hops up on
the apron and angrily drills Sid with the chair. Sid
is stunned, and DDD and Daddy Mack hit a double drop
kick that sends the big man over the top rope! Sid and
Olympus then brawl all the way to the back]]
Mike: What a rumble! "Deadly" Darren Dark has been in
the ring a long time-
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["Bad Boys" starts to play and the crowd cheers as
Big Boy waddles down to the ring. Big Boy squeezes
through the ropes and steps inside. Daddy Mack tries
to shoulder block the big man, but Big Boy knocks DM
down like a brick wall. Darren Dark then runs at
Biggie, only to get gorilla press slammed back to
earth. Big Boy grabs Daddy Mack and fires him across
the ring into the corner. Biggie shakes the ring as he
runs and nails a gigantic splash in the corner! The
crowd starts to count down again, and glass shatters
as Stone Cold Steve Austin stomps down to the ring.
Big Boy goes after Austin, but the rattlesnake kicks
Biggie below the belt, sending the 500-pounder down
like a sack of potatoes. Daddy Mack, still weary,
stumbles out of the corner, catches a boot from
Austin, and gets nailed with the Stunner! Daddy Mack
bounces back up from the impact, and Stone Cold hauls
off and decks Daddy Mack over the top rope to the
floor]]
Vince: Daddy Smack it outta here! I guess that's
everybody, but we've only had 14-
[[Biggie is back up and headbutts Austin. Lil' Homie
is on the outside, and he reaches into a bag marked
"Biggie's Lunch", and pulls out a gallon of frozen
solid ice cream! Homie tosses the rock-hard ice cream
to Big Boy, who decks Austin with it. Big Boy then
sets Stone Cold up and Biggie Bombs Stone Cold over
the top rope! DDD is up and he runs and drop kicks Big
Boy's knee. Dark continues to kick Big Boy in the
knee, backing him into a corner. DDD backs up and gets
a running start, but Big Boy recovers and decimates
DDD with a flying body press! Dark is hurt, and Biggie
motions for the top rope. The big man climbs the
turnbuckle and connects with the Super Size It on
"Deadly" Darren Dark! Big Boy lifts DDD's battered
body up and flings him over the top rope!]]
Vince: That's it, Big Boy is the winner?
Mike: That was only 14!
[[Big Boy is celebrating at center ring, when suddenly
the lights go out. The fans are cheering, and when the
lights come back on, there, standing behind Big Boy,
is...]
Mike: Oh my God, that's SEPHIROTH! Sephiroth is #15!!!
[[Big Boy doesn't see him, and Sephiroth backs up.
Seph backs to close to the far side ropes though, and
Lil' Homie reaches up and steals Sephiroth's kitana
blade without Seph noticing! Lil' Homie runs around to
the other side of the ring and starts to cut the top
rope. Meanwhile, Sephiroth spins Big Boy around and
goes for the Deadly Suplex on the big man to send him
over the top rope, but Sephiroth leans on the rope and
it snaps, and both men topple to the floor! The bell
rings]]
Mike: Who the hell is the winner?! They both hit at
the same time, does that mean that... they're BOTH the
Number 1 contender?!
[[Sephiroth grabs Big Boy and rolls him back into the
dismantled ring. Seph displays the strength, setting
Biggie up top, and then Sephiroth delivers the Tragic
End on the 500-pounder!Big Boy rolls to the floor in
pain and Sephiroth stands in the center of the arena
in the middle of deafening cheers]]
Your winners, and BOTH #1 Contenders, Big Boy and
Sephiroth
October 2, 1999
15 Man Royal Rumble for #1 Contendership
Mike: Archer is number one in the rumble, and it
doesn't look like Apollo will be joining us for
commentary. Too bad!
Vince: Pretty sarcastic, aren't we? Speaking of not
joining us, that makes me wonder: is Cy Kopath going
to be in the rumble or not?
Mike: That's an interesting point. I don't see how Cy
is going to be able to compete from his County
Hospital bed with third degree burns over 90% of his
body. I guess we're down to 14 men-
Vince: Unless someone else steps in...
[[The DX theme plays and the crowd cheers as X-Pac
walks down to the ring as the second man. He gets in
the ring and ducks a right hand from Archer, hitting a
spinning heel kick on the "Thrilla Killa". X-Pac seems
pumped and sends Archer against the ropes and X-Pac
connects with a flying clothesline. Archer is reeling,
and staggers back into the corner. X-Pac hits Archer
with a combination of kicks, and then gets a running
start and does the Bronco Buster on Archer. X-Pac
gives Archer a crotch chop, but Archer quickly gives
X-Pac a low blow]]
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1-
[["Buttermilk Biscuits" comes on and Bizarro makes his
way to the ring. Bizarro and X-Pac start double
teaming Archer, sending him against the ropes and
flattening him with a double clothesline. Bizarro and
X-Pac lift Archer up and execute a double suplex. All
of a sudden Bizarro kicks X-Pac in the stomach. He
executes a double underhook suplex on X-Pac. Bizarro
then whips X-Pac into the corner, puts X-Pac up top,
and sets up for the Zorro Buster. But Alex Archer
shoves Bizarro off the top rope all the way to the
outside]]
Mike: Bizarro's gone!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[[A car crash sounds over the PA and the crowd goes
wild as Mankind enters the ring. Mankind kicks Archer
in the gut and nails a double arm DDT. Mankind sets
Archer on the ropes and tries to push him over, but
Archer holds on. X-Pac comes over to help, but they
can't get Archer over. The crowd counts down again and
"Bullet With Butterfly Wings" plays as "Deadly" Darren
Dark makes his entrance. DDD tosses the TV title aside
and rolls in the ring, decking Mankind and then X-Pac.
DDD tries to get Archer over himself, but can't, so he
grabs the head of Archer and buries it in the ring mat
with the Deadly Downer. Dark gets up and turns around,
but Mankind is there to shove Mr. Socko in his gullet!
Mankind wears DDD down, forcing him towards the ropes.
X-Pac gets a running start, DDD ducks and X-Pac
connects with a spinning heel kick on Mankind that
sends the Deranged One over the top rope to the
floor]]
Vince: Finally that 190 pound bag of crap X-Pac did
something right! Mankind's fat ass is eliminated!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["Crimson Grin" plays and the crowd goes ballistic as
the former World champ Scorpion slowly walks to the
ring. Meanwhile, DDD and X-Pac slap a high five, but
Alex Archer hooks both from behind, executing a double
Russian leg sweep. Scorpion sees an opening and dives
inside. Alex Archer swings at Scorpion, Scorp ducks,
kicks Archer in the gut and delivers Z'Ha'Dum! Archer
convulses in pain on the mat. The crowd counts down
again and "When Worlds Collide" starts up, with the
fans going crazy as Daddy Mack makes his way to the
ring. DM climbs in and immediately goes after
Scorpion. Mack pummels Scorpion, but Scorpion kneels
down and picks DM up by the waist, pivots, and DDD is
there for the 3D! Scorpion and Darren Dark shake
hands, but DDD jerks Scorpion towards him, lifts him
up, and hits the Lights Out! Archer gets up and tries
to charge DDD, but Dark catches him in a T-bone
suplex, and DDD throws Alex Archer over the top rope
to the floor]]
Mike: Alex Archer has been eliminated from the rumble!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[[Eerie music plays and Lucifer walks to the ring. He
climbs inside and X-Pac goes for a hurricanranna on
Lucifer, but Lucifer catches X-Pac, lifts him up over
the top rope and powerbombs X-Pac all the way to the
concrete floor!!! Darren Dark kicks Lucifer, and
starts to choke him, but Lucifer lifts DDD up and hits
the Sacraficer. Lucifer is gloating, and turns his
back on the rest of his opponents, and Scorpion
clotheslines Lucifer up and over the top rope. The
people countdown and the "Batman/Bugeye" theme plays,
and Bugeye walks to the ring with Andre Wendell.
Bugeye grabs the Funk Force Stick from Andre and dives
in the ring. Bugeye charges Scorpion waiving the Funk
Force Stick, but Scorpion ducks, grabs Bugeye, and
easily tosses Bugeye over the top rope to the
outside!]]
Vince: That retard Bugeye is pissed off, and he isn't
leaving ringside!
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["I Will Be the Very Best" comes on and Meowth
motions for Jesse to stay backstage as he walks down
the ramp. DDD and Daddy Mack are fighting in one
corner, and Meowth gets in the ring and goes after
Scorpion. Meowth executes a neckbreaker on Scorpion
and tries to get Scorpion over the top rope. Just then
Bugeye climbs back in the ring behind Scorpion and
Meowth. Andre Wendell gets up on the apron and decks
Meowth in the dome with the Funk Force Stick, and then
Bugeye runs up behind both men and shoves both
Scorpion and Meowth over the top rope! Meowth
immediately jumps back in the ring, chases Bugeye
across it, out the other side, all the way to the
back. Andre Wendell is left alone. Scorpion walks up
to Wendell, glares at him, and then delivers
Z'Ha'Dum!]]
Vince: Wendell may be out cold, but Scorpion is out of
the rumble!
[[Daddy Mack and DDD are left in the ring trading
punches, when Greek music filters over the sound
system and Olympus walks out. Everyone is booing and
Olympus begins kicking Daddy Mack. Just then, after
only about a minute, the "Psycho" music comes on and
Sid walks to the ring to a huge pop from the crowd.
Sid gets in the ring, and Olympus gets a head of steam
off the ropes, but runs right into a big boot from
Sid. DDD and Daddy Mack just watch as Sid thrashes
Olympus. Sid picks Olympus up and powerbombs him. Then
Sid pulls Olympus back up, and slaps a huge hand
around the Greek God's throat. Sid lifts Olympus up
and chokeslams him all the way to the outside!!! Sid
is demanding "Who's the man?!" when Olympus reaches up
the ring and grabs a steel chair. Olympus hops up on
the apron and angrily drills Sid with the chair. Sid
is stunned, and DDD and Daddy Mack hit a double drop
kick that sends the big man over the top rope! Sid and
Olympus then brawl all the way to the back]]
Mike: What a rumble! "Deadly" Darren Dark has been in
the ring a long time-
Fans: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
[["Bad Boys" starts to play and the crowd cheers as
Big Boy waddles down to the ring. Big Boy squeezes
through the ropes and steps inside. Daddy Mack tries
to shoulder block the big man, but Big Boy knocks DM
down like a brick wall. Darren Dark then runs at
Biggie, only to get gorilla press slammed back to
earth. Big Boy grabs Daddy Mack and fires him across
the ring into the corner. Biggie shakes the ring as he
runs and nails a gigantic splash in the corner! The
crowd starts to count down again, and glass shatters
as Stone Cold Steve Austin stomps down to the ring.
Big Boy goes after Austin, but the rattlesnake kicks
Biggie below the belt, sending the 500-pounder down
like a sack of potatoes. Daddy Mack, still weary,
stumbles out of the corner, catches a boot from
Austin, and gets nailed with the Stunner! Daddy Mack
bounces back up from the impact, and Stone Cold hauls
off and decks Daddy Mack over the top rope to the
floor]]
Vince: Daddy Smack it outta here! I guess that's
everybody, but we've only had 14-
[[Biggie is back up and headbutts Austin. Lil' Homie
is on the outside, and he reaches into a bag marked
"Biggie's Lunch", and pulls out a gallon of frozen
solid ice cream! Homie tosses the rock-hard ice cream
to Big Boy, who decks Austin with it. Big Boy then
sets Stone Cold up and Biggie Bombs Stone Cold over
the top rope! DDD is up and he runs and drop kicks Big
Boy's knee. Dark continues to kick Big Boy in the
knee, backing him into a corner. DDD backs up and gets
a running start, but Big Boy recovers and decimates
DDD with a flying body press! Dark is hurt, and Biggie
motions for the top rope. The big man climbs the
turnbuckle and connects with the Super Size It on
"Deadly" Darren Dark! Big Boy lifts DDD's battered
body up and flings him over the top rope!]]
Vince: That's it, Big Boy is the winner?
Mike: That was only 14!
[[Big Boy is celebrating at center ring, when suddenly
the lights go out. The fans are cheering, and when the
lights come back on, there, standing behind Big Boy,
is...]
Mike: Oh my God, that's SEPHIROTH! Sephiroth is #15!!!
[[Big Boy doesn't see him, and Sephiroth backs up.
Seph backs to close to the far side ropes though, and
Lil' Homie reaches up and steals Sephiroth's kitana
blade without Seph noticing! Lil' Homie runs around to
the other side of the ring and starts to cut the top
rope. Meanwhile, Sephiroth spins Big Boy around and
goes for the Deadly Suplex on the big man to send him
over the top rope, but Sephiroth leans on the rope and
it snaps, and both men topple to the floor! The bell
rings]]
Mike: Who the hell is the winner?! They both hit at
the same time, does that mean that... they're BOTH the
Number 1 contender?!
[[Sephiroth grabs Big Boy and rolls him back into the
dismantled ring. Seph displays the strength, setting
Biggie up top, and then Sephiroth delivers the Tragic
End on the 500-pounder!Big Boy rolls to the floor in
pain and Sephiroth stands in the center of the arena
in the middle of deafening cheers]]
Your winners, and BOTH #1 Contenders, Big Boy and
Sephiroth